Thanks, Mom!

Last night, I was wasting my typical evening hours on the internet when I received an email notification that someone had commented on my blog post: my mom. It brought me back to this blog, which I've so obviously neglected (again... and again), and made me realize that I so desperately need to come back to writing. I recently tried setting my paper diary next to my bed in hopes that I would pick it up to write more often. No such luck. So here I am yet again, attempting to salvage myself. So, thank you to my mother, who has reminded me that I need (desperately) to get back to writing! I'll be back this time.

No, really. I am setting a calendar reminder in my phone to write tomorrow! ;)

Two Years Later... An Overdue Update

By pure chance, I happened to click on the bookmark for this (cough, cough dusty) blog and reread my last post... which was written about two years ago. TWO. YEARS. Apparently, I didn't do so well keeping up with this! In very similar ways, I have let my personal diary writing also take the backseat. But I've shoved so much of my creative and expressive self into that backseat that I've decided that I need to be more creative and reflective. So here goes nothing.

I am going to attempt to update the past two years of my life as simply as possible:

• I ended up being called back to work for the district that had laid me off. I started off in 1st grade for two months. Those were the most challenging two months of my teaching career thus far. I cried every single day. I would come home and try to think of anything BUT school and filled my nights with ice cream and old episodes of Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman. (Perhaps that was why this blog was ignored.) In November, I was given the opportunity to teach Pre-K in a different school (same district). I am so glad I made the decision to move. I met the most wonderful associate teacher and I have grown immensely as a teacher these past two years. I absolutely love my job teaching preschoolers!
• Dennis is in his final stretch of college courses! If all goes according to plan (but let's be real, colleges hardly ever cooperate), he will be done in a little over a year (if it doesn't go according to plan, then one and a half years from now). I'm excited for him and already starting to (try not to) stress about a new budgeting adventure: repaying student loans. 
• My little sister is engaged! And getting married in 22 days! I couldn't be happier for her. My heart is filled with pure joy. She has found her person and they're perfect. 

Of course, many other things have happened in these past two years, but that's the price I must pay for ignoring the blogging/journaling world. Here's to hoping that I can do better this time around! Fingers crossed, friends! 

Laying It Down

One of my very first CDs as a child was Jaci Velasquez's Heavenly Place. It was actually my mom's that she won on the radio and I recall looking through my parents's CDs trying to find it after hearing "On My Knees" on the radio. I just thought that song was the most beautiful thing that I'd ever heard and from that moment on, I found her music to be uplifting to me as a tween in middle school. I listened to that and her next few CDs on repeat throughout 7th and 8th grade. I continued to be a faithful fan and I still remember the CD release for Beauty Has Grace in 2005 when I was 15. My dad asked Family Christian Store if I could have the promo poster after the CD came out and they gave it to me. (What a sweet dad!) I had it hanging in my bedroom until I redecorated in college. At first, that CD wasn't my favorite. It was a very different style. I remember my dad telling me how good of a song "Lay It Down" was. At the time, I thought it was good, but I don't think I fully realized how truly beautiful it was. As I've gotten older, it's become clearer. But I have never needed to hear more than I did last Wednesday in the Miller's Expedition on our way back from kayaking. But let's back-track a bit...

Before my cousin's wedding in Indiana, I had an interview for a school district in my city that I really wanted to work for. Like, this was a big deal and an awesome chance for me. I walked out of the screening interview thinking I was done. But I got a call from the principal saying they wanted to give me a second interview. I was so excited (and terrified)! I did my homework and prepared as well as I could. The interview went fairly well, I felt confident in myself and I did my best. I waited all weekend and finally my phone rang on the ride back from kayaking. I couldn't answer in the car full of family, so I waited and listened to the voicemail. The words of the principal were incredibly kind and supportive. She told me that I was basically 2nd, in the nicest way possible. The reason I was 2nd, was due to that pesky lack of experience (which isn't really a fault). Goodness, the tears started pouring, and I tried to stop them. But I concealed them under my sunglasses and shrugged off my stuffy nose to allergies. But inside, my heart was breaking. I was texting my mom and praying. But then I saw Dennis' headphones and asked if I could borrow them (since he was using them). I didn't have much music on my iPhone, but "Lay It Down" happened to be one of the songs that I had downloaded for some reason. I hadn't really listened to it for awhile. So I put my head on D's shoulder and began listening. It was like this song was everything I was feeling. Like my heart was singing this song to God. And though the tears were streaming even more than before, I truly felt peace. And I still do. Does this suck? You bet. But just because this portion of my dream hasn't yet to be realized, doesn't mean it's dead. I just realized that I needed to let it go, to lay it down at God's feet and relinquish control. To just say, "Okay, Lord. I am giving you my future, my dreams, my career. You have a plan and I am ready to follow it. Lead me." Since that car ride, I have felt more peace about my career search than I have in a long time. I am excited to teach Pre-K for Head Start and I know that God is constantly working in me.

So, this is my prayer. This is where I am. I am laying it down every day, because that is all that I can do!

Family Wedding Fun!

This past weekend, we journeyed to South Bend, Indiana for my cousin Steffen's wedding to his beautiful (now) wife! It was a great weekend, though I am extremely tired today and grateful for a day to rest (sort of). There is still laundry, cleaning, and other household chores to do, of course!

Steffen has been a Notre Dame fan for, practically, ever. So getting married there was his dream. Typically, you have to be a current student or graduate to be able to get married there. At first, Steffen didn't realize this and it halted the wedding planning process for awhile. Then, a priest friend of his (who is the priest for the basketball team at ND), somehow was able to make everything work out for Steffen and Melanie. Basically, this never happens. They were extremely lucky!

The campus is beautiful. I had never been to Notre Dame before, so this destination wedding was both extremely fun and very educational! At first, the immense amount of construction on campus made things confusing. (We most definitely spent 20 minutes trying to find our dinner location for Friday night. Once we made it Legends, we were finally able to enjoy their amazing food! Can anyone say beer cheese burgers?)

But after we familiarized ourselves, it was easy to enjoy celebrating a marriage in a place so steeped in history. Steffen and Melanie got married in the Log Chapel, a cute little building near the lake.

There ceremony was absolutely beautiful. Steffen's face was so full of love when Melanie walked

into the chapel. The ceremony was beautiful and I was honored to sing the Responsorial Psalm and Gospel Acclamation. Congrats, Steffen and Melanie!

After the ceremony, we had some down time for pictures before our tour of the stadium! Of course, we had to snap a husband/wife pic! 

The stadium was awesome! We got to see Touchdown Jesus from the suites and the field itself. We touched the iconic "Play Like a Champion Today" sign in the locker room! And of course, Curly Lambeau's plaque! GO PACK GO!

The reception was beautiful and located at South Dining Hall, which looked more like it should be at Hogwarts than Notre Dame. We had a great time dancing the night away with family and friends. An overall awesome wedding! 

Obligatory family picture that I absolutely love!

We went to mass at the Basilica the next morning and it was quite a traditional experience. It was absolutely beautiful and was nice to experience a different kind of reverence towards God.

Congratulations to the new Mr. and Mrs. Nizinski! :) 

Guess What is Coming?! AUTUMN!!!

Let me just start with this:

I. LOVE. FALL.

Insert an autumn-inspired sigh here. Ahh. :) Even though August just began, I am so very ready for all things autumn. I'm done with summer! I mean, I am perfectly content with summer vacation, but I could go for a season change! Last Monday's weather here in Michigan was a fall lover's dream: overcast, occasional rain shower, 64 degrees. Yes, yes, YES! I definitely did some blanket cuddling last Monday! But today, it's much too warm for my liking. The fan is blowing on me while I type, but it's still unbearable. And it doesn't help that our house has the complete opposite layout of an open floor plan. Can anyone say, "no air flow"? Why yes, yes I can. I'm mentally adding this to my list of things for the house we someday buy!

Anyways, back to the topic at hand... to make this even more perfect, Bath & Body Works is currently having a "1 Week Sneak Peek" for fall items!! Perfect timing. And they are even getting their website all ready for fall! I have already gone to the store and purchased an Apple Pumpkin 3-wick candle, this ADORABLE owl candle, some apple scented hand cream, and the new Honeycrisp Apple and Buttered Rum Orchard body care (mist and lotion). Love it. The staying power could be a little bit better, but the scent is ahhhmazing. I'm just SO pumped for the rest of the fall releases.

Tomorrow, their Artisan collection launches in stores. And apparently, also some more of the fall candles. So you can bet your bottom dollar that I will be in the store tomorrow! Unfortunately, we are a one car family, so I will be waiting until Dennis is home from work. But I have something to keep me occupied. I will update on that tomorrow!

Vacation Depression

I always get immensely sad after a vacation is over. There is just so much build-up and preparation before hand and then the vacation goes SO QUICKLY. This year, Barothy just flew by and I am not quite sure why... especially because we checked in at about 10:00 am on Monday, that is way earlier than normal! I'm just not sure why it went so quickly this year. And it was very different without Grandma. I missed her so much this week and I know Grandpa missed her the most of all. He actually walked down the hallway to bed on the last night sobbing. Grieving absolutely sucks. :( So combining our grief with the fact that Barothy 2014 is over is what has prompted this on-going "vacation depression". I was actually in all-out tears on Friday night. Just crying about so many things. But I am grateful because it spurred a need to return to my diary. I really gave that up over the past couple of years. But! I am trying my hardest to make it a regular habit again. We will see how it goes. Until later, my friend. It's time to veg in front of the TV and recover from not only "vacation depression" but also, "vacation exhaustion"!! ;)

Packing Problems

I'm probably the worst packer in the world. I'm not even kidding. I could be going away for one night and I will have at least 2-3 bags. And honestly, I don't set off to absolutely suck at packing, I truly try to only pull out what I NEED. But then... I start thinking. Thinking is my downfall when it comes to packing. And I can't even use weather as a crutch. I am obsessed with weather, so I know the forecast and its varying range possibilities at any given time. It's just that I think I don't like limiting myself while on vacation. Like, I don't want to open my bag with disgust and not like any of my options. So my alternative is to have too many options. Like perhaps even triple what I need. I know, I know... something has to change. So maybe I should get off of the computer and de-pack. Or... start next time. ;)